Words on Being a Good Father

It’s so easy to feel that, as a father, the only responsibilities you will have is to work, pay the bills, and play ball with the kids when it suits them, or you. But this isn’t the case. Fatherhood is much more than that, and the role of the father is just as important as that of the mom. Which is why it is critical that would-be fathers, or new dads, take the necessary steps to be the best father they could ever be.

First, be sure to commit time to your kids. This may sound cliché, but most new fathers who think about this, end up not following through to the end, and oftentimes, would barely see the kids before they leave for work, and after they arrive. Taking a few minutes per morning to wish them well, and an hour or so playing with them after work, will add up over the months, and will only be good in building a relationship with the kids.

Next, don’t be afraid to show a lot of affection. Most fathers would light up upon seeing their very young kids, but as they grow older, tend to not show the affection they feel like they used to. Being a man doesn’t mean being tough all the time, and showing your children how much you love them constantly, may be mushy and icky to them, but rest assured, it is something they need.

Don’t be afraid to get down and dirty with the children. Whether it’s changing the diapers of a newborn or toddler, or building a dirt fort with the older kids in the backyard. Going beyond the comfort zone to do things that wouldn’t normally be done would break barriers, and show the kids, and yourself, that you would do anything for the children’s happiness.

Remember to have fun when needed, but also be stern when needed. While it is good that the children feel that they have a friend in you, you are primarily, a father, and a father is what they need. Reprimand them when they do something wrong, and commend them when they do something right. In doing this however, be sure to not place unreasonable expectations on your children and yourself. Just as they are growing up, so you too are growing into a father.

In addition, while it is reasonable to get mad when they do unwanted things, most of the time there is a good reason as to why kids do what they do. Opening up and being a good listener, without making them fear the repercussions at once, will show them that they can trust you with their problems and mistakes, and that while you will get mad, you will understand. This is important, as many kids today tend to distance themselves from the parents for this particular reason.

Lastly, realize that your job will never be done. Being a father is a job that you can never quit, never ask days off from, and never cease doing. Even when the kids have all grown up, and have become fathers and mothers in their own right, your job will still not be over. But once you realize that it is a job well worth doing, then you will be on your way to becoming the best father you can be.

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